[dropcap]A[/dropcap]t some point in life, we all crave to get into a relationship. We feel the need to love and be loved back. But how do you enter a relationship? And how do you get in a relationship especially when you have never been in a relationship before?
There are different reasons people have for going into a relationship – some good, some, not so good.
But firstly, ask yourself “Why do I want to get into a relationship? Is it because others have a partner and I don’t?” Get clear about why you need the other person first. It is not just about you but the other person want the relationship? It is a give-and-get mutuality.
Here are some vital tips to help you get into a relationship and build it:
Build your self-esteem
You cannot love someone or get into a relationship with someone else if you don’t love the person in the mirror enough. Inferiority complex is one reason why people cannot get into a healthy relationship and stay. Build self-esteem and get confident about yourself.
Be clear about your relationship goals and don’t let the experience of others deter you
Why do you want a relationship? What do you intend to achieve having and keeping that relationship? What kind of person do you want the relationship with? What do you want it to lead to? And also let the other person know your expectations as they share theirs too.
You cannot have the same relationship experiences as others. This is because their goals are different from yours or they didn’t even have goals in the first place. Because theirs didn’t work out don’t mean you can’t work something out for yourself and your relationship.
Learn what builds and makes a strong lasting relationship
Before you get into a relationship, you need to learn what builds and keeps a relationship. These four are always present in such relationships:
(a). Communication (b). Understanding
(c). Trust (d). Tolerance
Don’t allow familiarity to breed contempt
There are people very close to you that you may take for granted in going into a relationship with just because you see them as friends. You have become used to seeing them and getting into a relationship with them is a NO for many.
Who else will understand you better if not a friend? But most ladies would prefer not to. And even while in the relationship, don’t become bored by getting used to the other person. Learn to respect the other person as time passes.
Watch out for what the other person likes and dislikes – then ask yourself if you can tolerate them or not
They all come in packages. There is something that makes you like someone. There is also a possibility of them possessing something in their behaviour orb attributes you may not like. Focus on the good and tolerate the not-so-good.
You will have something that got them attracted to you and also something that turns them off.
Learn your partner’s strengths and weaknesses and learn to tolerate them. Else, walk…
Start off with the common things
The common things are the ones that unite us. What things do you like that they also like? Where do they like going that they love too?
When you want to enter a relationship, put one leg in first. Then if it is okay you can put the second leg in and be swept away by the currents of love. Love is not blind. Every healthy relationship has eyes and can see clearly what it wants. Enter a relationship with your eyes open.
Are you in a relationship? How did you get into it? What is sustaining it? You can leave comments about how you got into your relationship below.
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